You haven't seen this in a while. I'm sure you missed it.
Duties are what they are and that's meant no Sports Talk, but when there's been a week like this in soccer, I had to dust off the keyboard and give 'er.
What a glorious last couple of days it's been and it's brought me joy to no end. I speak, of course, about Manchester United, Celtic and Rangers all managing to go out in spectacular fashions. In the case of Manchester United and Celtic, they ended up getting jobbed by teams they had no business being jobbed by. For Rangers, they ended up getting bent over and turned inside out.
We begin in the town of Grimsby, located in Lincolnshire on the banks of the Humber. The English Football League Cup featured a contest on Wednesday with Grimsby Town hosting Manchester United. For those of you who don't know, Manchester United plays in the Premier League, the top tier of English soccer. Grimsby Town plays in League Two, the fourth tier of English soccer. Dozens of places between them.
Now, you'd think this would be a rather pedestrian job for Manchester United: roll up, do the business and go home for a few pints. Grimbsy Town was probably just happy because it would be a sellout and there would be TV coverage. That meant a good night for the chequing account.
But would I be writing about this if United won? Exactly.
Grimsby Town scored two goals in the first 30 minutes of the contest and led at halftime, 2-0. Let's be honest - it really could've been more because United were absolutely putrid in the first half. They were the ones who looked like a League Two side, if not worse.
United decided to take things more serious in the second half and managed to tie it late, and I mean late. Their goals came in with less than 10 minutes left on the clock. That meant extra time, which solved nothing, meaning it was off to the penalty shootout. It went a bit longer than the regulation five shots and in the 13th round, United's Bryan Mbuemo rang one off the crossbar to give Grimsby Town one of their most famous wins and new headaches for United manager Ruben Amorim.
Meanwhile, Scotland's two biggest clubs, Celtic and Rangers, each had their misadventures in Champions League qualifying. I'll spare you most of the details.
Celtic was playing a team called Kairat Almaty from Kazakhstan and ended up losing in a penalty shootout there, so they're finished. You've never heard of Kairat Almaty and neither have I, but I would definitely use it as a WiFi password. As for Rangers, they were shown the door courtesy of Club Brugge of Belgium in their two-game contest by a total score of 9-1. Rangers are off to a hot start this season, losing both of their Champions League games and still looking for their first win in the Scottish Premiership. Couldn't even beat my beloved St. Mirren (come on, the Buddies!)
Results like this remind us that sport can be fun sometimes. There is no better optic in sports than watching big clubs get their comeuppance from smaller sides whose payroll is probably equal to the lowest-paid player on the big team's roster. That's what happened to United and Celtic. In the case of Rangers, it was a case of being just downright awful.
And spare me the excuse, Rangers fans, of how your team was down to 10 men because Max Aarons was given a straight no-doubt red card for hauling on a Club Brugge player. The solution there is don't be stupid, mark your man properly and you won't have players sent off.
So what happens now? Well, Amorim's job is now in jeopardy after that performance in Grimsby. A line-up worth hundreds of millions of dollars lost to a side which is worth, well, not hundreds of millions of dollars. Pundits like you and I and anyone else who has a two-cent opinion can say whatever, but you simply don't lose to Grimsby Town if you're Manchester United. Amorim was already under the gun after United finished 15th last season in the Premier League, their worst showing since 1974 when they were relegated to the old Second Division.
They played Burnley in Premier League action on the weekend and you know if the result wasn't what the faithful expected, the plank will get even shorter for Amorim.
As for the Old Firm - the term given to Rangers and Celtic - it was another European excursion that ended well before they wanted. Rangers manager Russell Martin is in the same boat as Amorim in that the fans want him gone after a grand total of less than a dozen games in charge. Welcome to the wonderful world of the big time, I suppose. Celtic manager Brendan Rogers isn't facing as baying a mob as Martin is, but you know the rumblings are there. You simply don't lose to Kairat Almaty and expect to move on.
We'll see what happens. Amorim may be out of a job this week, while the Old Firm do battle at Ibrox, Rangers' home ground, on Sunday. The defibrillators may be needed for that one if Rangers fall to East Glasgow's finest.
